I know this is probably just a result of me being up at 2 AM and watching this E! True Hollywood Story on Current Britney... but it's there and I want to say it.
You're probably used to hearing from fans all telling you how much they love you and adore you and want to be like you, and so on. I'd like to write to you to tell you some other things.
I listened to your first album for a little while; it was actually one of the first CDs I'd ever bought. I liked it for about four weeks, and then I put you right back on the rack with Christina and Mandy in the Triumvirate of Bubblegum Pop Princesses. You had some good tunes. It was the 90s. Whatever. I thought you were pretty and very Middle American and fresh-faced. Much like Christina (used to be) and Mandy Moore (still manages to be). You happen to be a beautiful girl when you're not cracked out or bald. I won't deny that. And your body is rockin' after two kids. For that I admire you.
But from a girl who looked up to you, sort of, I don't know what to say anymore! I'm tired of hearing about you in the news these days, because it's never anything good. The latest Mexican escapade with that random guy? Dude, Britney, please. You are not in love with him. Trust me.
Rosarita Beach. Sheesh.
In case you are not already aware, you have two beautiful little boys. And really, they are beautiful kids. Homegirl, you're a mother now. No matter how old you are, the bottom line is, you have kids now. I'm truly sorry you never got the chance to be a crazy 20-year-old. You see how well Lindsay's done with that. You've been performing all your life, and to be honest, you've made some amazing achievements. You worked your ass off! You're very talented, and I think anyone who denies that is stupid. But you're a mother now, and that means your days of partying, as much as this sucks, are consigned to the realms of shoulda-coulda-woulda. And quite frankly, I'd rather you didn't-a. Again, I'm so sorry you never got to do these things when you were at the age where it would be (slightly more) appropriate. But like I said, Jayden and Sean are the ones that matter now, and it would be amazing for you and for them if you got yourself back into their lives. They need you and you know what? You need them. As much as you make this "I'm a grown-up now!" facade, you need your babies. They are the ones who are going to love you no matter what. You owe them the same consideration.
I can't express how sorry I am that all this crappy shit has happened to you. I don't know what it's like to live in the spotlight, but I cringe when I see the footage of paparazzi storming you all the time. And you encourage it! That astounds me. For someone who has as many considerations as you, among them your children, I have to marvel at the fact that you felt going out without underwear was some kind of appropriate move. Publicity stunts are not what you need right now. That gets you the wrong kind of fame, my love, and that wrong kind of fame is unfortunately all you have, and unfortunately something you've brought on yourself. Britney, please. I don't know why you seem to hate yourself so much, because you really don't have reason to, but for God's sake, please get some help. You are not a monster, you are not a bad person, you do not deserve this misery. I wish there was a way to make you really, really believe that, because you don't seem to.
You're looking for stability in all the wrong places, because the only person who can give you the stability is you. Who's this Adnan dude? And your wigger ex-husband? Please, girl. You're the only person who can fix you. So give yourself the chance. Stay home. Dump that Adnan guy. For the love of Christ, do not go near Promises. That ain't rehab. That's a detox stop before you go out and get cracked out again. Do a real rehab, like Lindsay. See, she was pulling bullshit too, but she's locked herself in a rehab in Utah. Mormons are good for detox and rehab. They don't do much crazy stuff. And good for Lindsay. She needs the rehab, and the reality check. I congratulate her.
I'm not saying you should go back to being 1999 Britney. A) that's stupid, and B) it's impossible. You're 26, you're past it, you've moved on. But at least 1999 Britney didn't seem to hate herself as much as you seem to. Fame is fleeting. Aren't you sick of being on the news all the time? And not even for good things?
Here's another thing. Please redefine your idea of "fun." "Fun" does not mean going out and getting wasted every night. Yeah, it's "fun" to get into all those trendy little clubs, but trust me babygirl, they are not laughing with you. They're laughing at you. Everything you're doing is pushing your boys further and further away from you, and you're already at rock bottom. Please see that the only way out is up. Paris and Lindsay and all the other crackhead gals you hung out with were not your real friends. That whole deal is like 8th grade with alcohol and drugs and loud music thrown in. None of them are grown-ups who take real responsibility for themselves and their actions, so don't you turn into one of them. You and Lindsay worked hard for your money, and it's really not cute to snort your savings. Especially you, Brit, 'cause, angel, you gotta put those boys through life and college. Your mother isn't going to raise your children for you, and neither is your staff. You have to do it. You took the first step and brought them into this world; it's your job to guide them and put them on the right path in life, however that path may look. Educate them, love them, comfort them, support them, be behind them every step of the way, and life will turn around. The fact that you blatantly disregarded what the judge ordered you to do in terms of parenting classes is horrifying to me. You have got to love your babies. I know you do. Get out of your own way. I know you have it in you to fix all this. It's a matter of you growing up enough to say, "Yes, I want to be there for my children, and I want to get out of this rut I'm in, and I want to be normal again." You've made your money. You really don't need more, you really don't need to restart your career, and you really don't need any more media attention. Take your money, get some help, stay home, and prove that you deserve to have your boys back in your life. Prove, like Lindsay, that you can take control of this situation, because you definitely can. She did, and you can too. You have to want to. You have to want your sons back, you have to want to be just a plain old normal gal. You've had your chance to shine. You shone! You did great. Now please go home and raise your children. Raise them in what faith you see fit, in what clothes you see fit, in what home you see fit, but for God's sake be there and be clean. They're yours to love, and yours to lose. Don't lose them forever.
Love yourself, love yourself, love yourself. Ain't nobody can do it but you. LOVE YOURSELF. You deserve it. Love yourself.
Oh, and throw your little sister a great baby shower, and KEEP HER OFF THE STICK UNTIL SHE'S OLDER!
With much hope and love,