- Awareness of the American public: In other words, awareness that the majority of the American population is so God-rotting stupid they re-elected Bush, and that most of the time, people really just want the status quo. Most of America is not aware that other countries exist beyond their own borders, other than a superficial awareness of what they were told in school; hell, most high schoolers can't find their country on a map. A good president has to, above all, maintain the status quo. People in this country don't give a shit about what's going on overseas or in The Iraq (God help us) as long as their daily lives are not disturbed. A good president will also have to be aware of the constant, enduring racism, sexism, and ignorance of the American people; if Barack Obama is elected, there will be assassination attempts on him constantly. If Hillary Clinton is elected, there will be assassination attempts on her constantly, because there are still people in this great, progressive nation of ours who still say (and forgive my use of these words, I use them only to make my point) no niggers and no cunts in the White House. There are still people in this nation who cannot stomach the thought of being presided over by anyone except a white Christian male from the South. And why not? The people whose votes actually counted in the last election (not counting those who were disenfranchised, of course) were white Christians from the South and Midwest. The blue states were outnumbered by the majority of the God-rotting stupid population who think that since Bush got us into this
- Experience: Not as president, per se, but with American politicians, the law of the country, and the socio-economic aspects of politics. Hillary Clinton's plan for universal healthcare, while wonderful and rather socialistic of her, is unrealistic. I thank her for the thought anyway. It failed in Canada, rather spectacularly, and it will fail here unless Mrs. Clinton can come up with a plan to give free universal healthcare without taxing American citizens to infinity and beyond. In all other respects, however, having been First Lady for eight years, senator of New York State after that, and a lawyer in her own right, Mrs. Clinton seems eminently suited for the position. Barack Obama holds a degree from Harvard Law School and Columbia University. He is also a senator, and while I like Mr. Obama very much, I find his lack of experience in the grindhouse that is American politics rather unsettling, though he will have my vote if he wins the party nomination.
- Patience, Tolerance, and Good People Skills: Those three attributes are how rulers and presidents succeed. How do you think Hitler established the Third Reich? Admittedly he was lacking in tolerance, but patience and people skills he had in spades. If you have ever seen a speech made by Hitler, you don't even need to understand German to know that he was a great orator, and that was how he won the people over. He promised them the moon and stars and delivered his speeches in impeccable uniform, speaking from a platform emblazoned unmistakably with his symbols, and had around him at all times a coherent, faultless guard. People love nothing more than a good show, and an affable host. Hitler did both. Now I realize he was a mass-murdering fuckhead (to quote Eddie Izzard) and I hate him and what he stood for, but his campaign was damn good. All rulers and politicians can admire the organization if not the message behind it. A good president must be able to relate to his or her public without losing the sense of power and authority that a leader must have. Tolerance is essential; any country will always be filled with idiots. A good president must realize this and tolerate it, as well as tolerating criticisms, religious differences, and general asshattery that will without a doubt occur.
- Education: No President Billy-Bob. Point made.
There's more, but for me, I'm looking for someone to fix our international policy and relations, sweep out the garbage from the Bush administration, and hopefully fire this fuckhead who's running the Fed since he seems to be masturbating constantly rather than paying attention to the goddamned inflation rate.